First Schoolteacher in Space
It’s hard to believe it’s been 20 years since the space shuttle Challenger exploded. I remember that day as if it were last week. I woke up late that day, and rode the bus into work. I didn’t have to be there until 4 in the afternoon, so I slept in, but didn’t watch or listen to the news before work. As I got there, they had the news on in the bar. I was working at the Chi-chi’s that used to be on Transit Road at the time, and to get in, you had to walk through the bar. That’s when I saw what happened.
It was quite a blow to NASA, and the country at that time. It was a terrible tragedy. But it wasn’t long before the jokes started coming out.
Q: Did you know that Christa McAuliffe was blue eyed?
A: One blew left and one blew right.
Q: What were Christa McAuliffe’s last words?
A: “What’s this button do?”
Q: What were Christa McAuliffe’s last words to her husband?
A: “You feed the kids – I’ll feed the fish.”
Q: What was the Shuttle’s last transmission?
A: “I said BUD LITE!”
Q: What does NASA stand for?
A1: Need Another Seven Astronauts
A2: Need Another Shuttle Also
Q: Did you know why there was only one black crew member on Challenger?
A: They didn’t know it was going to blow up.
Q: Did you know that NASA has a new space drink?
A: Ocean Spray – It was their second choice because they couldn’t get 7-UP.
Q: When the next shuttle launches into space, what will the senior controller say?
A: “72, 73, 74 BOOM! – Just kidding guys!”
Q: What do Playtex tampon users and Christa McAuliffe have in common?
A: They both should have stayed on the pad.
Q: What does a sea lion and the space shuttle have in common?
A: They’re looking for a tight seal.
Q: How many people will fit in a Florida Volkswagen?
A: Four in the seats and seven in the ashtray.
Q: On future shuttle missions, why will one of the astronauts have to be a naval officer?
A: So when they decide to use it as an experimental submarine, they’ll have a rated officer onboard.
Q: What do Christa McAuliffe and Donna Rice have in common.
A: They both went down on the challenger.
Q: Did you hear that they are sending up another teacher on the next shuttle mission?
A: She’s going to be a substitute.
Of course, my favorite was taking a match, pressing it against the striking area on a matchbook, and flicking it through the air as it lights and burns out. You then ask, “You know what that was? The first schoolteacher in space.” It always got at least a groan, but often a belly laugh.
What kills me, though, is the fact that 20 years later, WE ARE STILL USING THE SAME FRAKKING SPACE SHUTTLES. TWENTY YEARS.
Think about that. How far could we be if we had major upgrades every 10 years? We probably wouldn’t have had a Challenger explosion.
