Pat Condell’s Godless Comedy
A friend sent me a link to a video by a certain Pat Condell. It was quite funny, I thought. Many Conservative types will eat it up, if only because they are Islamophobic. I can see it now:
C’mere, Lou-retta! Y’all got to see dis feller! He’s tellin’ it like it is ’bout those damned towelheads! Yee-haw! I wish I could see the’ look on one of dem goatfucking sand-niggers faces as dey watch this! It’d probley make’em strap on some dynah-mite and blowed demselves up in some market in Gee-roo-salem or suh-um!
Then he’s start watching some of the other videos, and quietly surf to the 700 Club or some website like that to pray for forgiveness.
Mr. Condell, you see, isn’t just against Islam. He’s against all religions, especially the “three desert religions” as he refers to Judaism, Christianity and Islam. He thinks we should abolish all religions, especially those who bottom-feed and rape slow-brained and downtrodden people’s minds by giving them false hope. Get rid of the ones that make millions by sucking off the poorest of the poor. Get rid of those churches that get away with not paying taxes when everyone else is getting screwed by the government. The faster this gets done, the better. I have to say that I agree with him. I’m not as vocal about it as he is, of course, because I feel that religion and thoughts about religion are personal and should be kept that way, but I do agree with him.
I don’t like it when Scientologists and Jehovah’s Witnesses accost me downtown when I’m listening to Stephanie Miller on my way to work. I don’t like being handed pamphlets on how I can save my soul from the devil and eternal damnation in train stations. I don’t like looking at my money and seeing religious sayings printed on it by the government, because some stick-up-the-ass religious nut cases want to be free to express their religion to everyone else, but they don’t want me to not believe in their god: that’s not freedom of religion, it’s freedom for their religion. I don’t like saying the words “under god” when I say the Pledge to the Flag. I say “under gods” in reference to Battlestar Galactica – people just think I’m saying “under god”. I don’t even like it when people say “god bless you” when I sneeze – I’d rather hear “gesundheit”, “take care”, “a tes souhaits”, “salud”, “is it a cold or just allergies?”, or even better, “I hope you’re feeling well”. I don’t even like those sappy religious emails that people forward along that you have to scroll though 50 pages of email addresses to read some mealy-mouthed religious claptrap. I don’t force my beliefs, ideas, and thoughts about the greater reality on others, and I don’t expect others to force theirs on me.
Some might say, “Well, you are writing in your blog about what you believe in, and that’s forcing your beliefs on me.” To them I say, grab your nuts and take some responsibility for your own actions, you spineless moron. You’re the idiot reading this. I’m not forcing you to: you are choosing to read this. I don’t know where you live, and I’m certainly not standing behind you with a Colt .45 pistol against the back of your head making you read every last word of what I am writing here. So don’t blame me or cause me any trouble because YOU ARE CHOOSING TO READ THIS. IT’S YOUR DECISION, NOT MY WILL THAT IS MAKING YOU READ THIS.
But I digress. I was writing about Mr. Condell’s website.
I was pleasantly amused by his videos and his writings. First of all, as I said earlier, because I agree with him. Secondly, because I like the way the British say things. They can be so damned polite, and yet so damned funny and insulting at the same time.
Q: You don’t understand Christianity/Islam.
A: I don’t understand smallpox or typhoid either, and I’m equally disinclined to get acquainted with them.
I know a great many people who would be not at all happy to have their religious beliefs compared to deadly diseases, but it’s still damned funny. And politely worded.
Thirdly, the Feedback section is the bomb. It’s amazing how hateful and stupid, yet funny, people are. The guy’s an Atheist, and yet several people called him a Jew (I WOULD BURN HIM IN THE HOT OIL HE IS A LIEING JEW). Most insults were of the homosexual type, and sometimes involving animals (i hope a horse rapes u in hell. ass hole). Most of the comments involved some sort of violence being visited on Mr. Condell’s person. Almost every single one involved bad spelling and even worse punctuation. (dis guy is a dick who does he think he iz im a muslim and i take my religion serious and diz guy is a dick if you are watching PATCONDEL i think you should get life insurance cause noone says anything bad about jesus WARNING! ). Finally, some just don’t make sense ( Id be careful if I was you pat fair enough sudan made a mistake but us muslims are fully aware of your videos having a cheap laugh at us. we all no what happend to theo van gogh,pim fortuyn and theres that bitch/vermin who’s in hiding ayaan hirsi ali). Someday, I’ll figure that one out.
It’s funny, yet sad, how violently ignorant the people who leave comments are. I especially liked the one comment that basically said that Condell has no morals because he has no fear of god. Now, Schopenhauer argued that morality is based on compassion. Darwin argued that morality comes from doing good for others and receiving praise and love for it. Burdick says that moral behaviors are a result of personal and cultural conditioning. I’d argue that morality is a learned system and is influenced by altruism and species survival, but that’s another posting altogether. Being moral out of fear of retribution is a slave-like mentality, and is more akin to how an abused wife or child acts than a free thinking human would act. It is doing things because you have to, not because you want to, and places the responsibility of how you act outside yourself, rather than inside yourself. It is a weak position, and reeks of immaturity.
I am reminded by some of the comments of Jeff Dunham’s bit with Achmed, The Dead Terrorist. SILENCE, I KEEL YOU! Now that was a funny bit. I’m also reminded of a “discussion” that I had years ago with a supposed Muslim in a chatroom. He was claiming that Islam was a religion of peace. Now that may or may not be true, but the rank and file Islamists are for the most part extremely violent people. This is not to say the average Muslim is violent; I am referring to the radical fundamentalist Muslims. This is especially true against those who are not Muslims of whatever particular flavor the Islamist is, be it Shiite, Sunni, Muwahhidun, or whatever they call themselves. While this Muslim I was chatting with claimed to be college-educated and peaceful, he ultimately left the conversation typing in all capital letters and talking about how he would cut me into tiny pieces and feed my dead carcass to the dogs in the street, after he had his horse fuck my dead body in the ass while my soul was eternally tortured by Satan. What a peaceful guy he turned out to be.
Overall, I was highly entertained by Condell, his videos, and his website. It was a worthy expenditure of my time. I will be visiting his site from time to time to see more of his material.
